The darkness, deep and thick, covering the whole sky. Like black feathers – a raven’s song, a harbinger.
There’s a quietness, a pill-induced numbness, but the pain is not really receding; I can feel my heart beating erratically.
The heartache and the emptiness. The heartache and the surrender.
I swallow my meds like a liquid promise – a promise already broken.
A nightmare-drenched sleep. I bargain with death, but either way I lose.
A tear that clings to my eye. A single tear…
and then comes the pouring rain. Drowning, drowning everything and I can’t stop.
Despair, a stillness, before the burn. “Do you want to die?”
“I want to sleep. A dreamless sleep. Silent moments before the dawn.”